A little too much

Matt Roloff and his family star in a TLC Reality Series, Little People, Big World, which follows a dwarf mom and dad and their four children, one of whom is also a dwarf. It's actually interesting as the family meet daily challenges that we average sized people don't even think about (such as getting into and driving a van). It's actually kind of uplifting, although I'm not so sure that the youngest child, age 10, is as thrilled or as used to the camera intrusion as the others in this 24/7 coverage of their life on an Oregon farm.

Last summer, Matt was arrested for DUI while driving the family van in Oregon. According to reports, Matt failed the sobriety test in what turns out to be his second citation for the same offense. Apparently, he just came off a 16-month sentence of court supervision, after which the first charges were dropped.

Anyway, Matt appeared in court today and, as one might expect, because he is now a famous personage, the whole thing hit the Web along with his booking photo. It's the booking photo about which I am writing because in it Matt appears relaxed and smiles for the camera. Gives me the feeling he knew it would end up on the Internet (what doesn't) and he wanted to look like the respectable farm dad he portrays on TV. No wild hair, no wild eyes, no disheveled appearance. Today, his lawyer said Matt was tired and that's why he was swerving. Also, Matt walks unsteadily with the aid of two crutches, so I don't think he could walk that straight line under any circumstances. But then he did refuse to take the breathalyzer.

The Roloffs don't strike me as fabulously wealthy. In fact, if not for TLC, I doubt they could have afforded that family vacation (duly recorded for our consumption) in the Bahamas or the newly installed swimming pool. They already have two sons in college (and we know what that cost) and a daughter who will be in college in a few years. They raise pumpkins and corn for sale to the public and have created a farm wonderland for summer tourists. I'm wondering now what will happen if Matt is convicted of DUI. I know that the court proceedings will part of the show (everything else is).

Which gets me back to the whole issue of fame and why we (and I include myself in this) watch ordinary people, like the Roloffs live their lives (regardless of the extraordinary circumstances). Having sold his family to TLC, Matt has a lot more to lose than just his driving privileges. And I think he knows that and that's the reason for his pleasant suburban dad mug shot.

On the other hand, I sure wish my life was so interesting that someone would pay me to star in my own reality series. Lord knows, I need the money, and the fan love wouldn't be unwelcomed.

Some one should stop that man

Dr. Phil, TV's lovable shrink, may have stepped into ethical doo-doo this time, by visiting Britney Spears toward the end of her recent 36 hour stay at a mental health facility. I'd have no problem if Dr. Phil's visit was private, but what happened Sunday (Jan 6) seemed more like a "house call." Or maybe he was just lining up another guest for his talk show. According to one story, it was Britney's worried dad who invited the good doctor to visit Britney, but in what capacity? As a family friend? As a therapist? Dr. Phil certainly thought this pathetic tale was worthy of a TV show, having announced that he was going to focus on Britney's problems on Monday (Jan 7)

My problem with Dr. Phil and his show is that it masquerades as something other than entertainment--if watching people with real problems slug it out in public can be called entertainment. The only difference between Dr. Phil and Jerry Springer is that Dr. Phil has a PhD, well that and the fact that most of his guests have all of their teeth.

But when not judgmentally brow beating his guests, Phil dispenses dime-store psychology in front of his cheer audience. Further exposing Spears and her problems in television does not an intervention make, even if it is good for the ratings.

Phil has backed off with a face saving statement, which may not appease the psychiatric staff at Cedars Mount Sinai where Britney was admitted. Meanwhile, Britney is out and about. I smell death in the air.

And what does it say about us? Why do people eschew real help and comfort by  turning instead to a TV expert, whether it's Dr. Phil or Pat Robertson. Why do we place our trust in people whose major accomplishment is writing a best selling self-help book or dispensing one-size-fits all advice? Only in America, folks, only in the United States.

Enough already

Pictures of a disheveled and possibly drugged Britney Spears are everywhere as the news of her major meltdown is reported by a sanctimonious press. Meanwhile, her children are in the custody of their father, who drove like a maniac so as to block chasing papparazzi who wanted photos of the tots. Everything about this story stinks of schandenfreud, the taking delight in the suffering of others. At 26, Britney has been on view for half of her life. She became the family cash cow in 1993, when at age 12 she was chosen to appear in the New Mickey Mouse Club. By age 17, she was an international sensation.

Although there are labor laws to protect child performers, nothing is done to protect them from the pitfalls of being in a competitive business. Yes, there is competition in real life, but your family won't be forced into bankruptcy if Johnny fails to make the football team.

The essential role of a child star is to be famous, but fame is not intrinsic. You don't have to be talented or smart or attractive to be famous. Paris Hilton is famous for being famous. Fame exists in the mind of the observer. And if you are famous, the public can also make you infamous. And what does it mean really if you are famous but lose custody of your children and the whole thing becomes a media circus? I return again to the series finale of Extras, in which Ricke Gervais explores the nature of fame and what happens when we pursue it or place it above all else.

All of Britney's current fame is based on her recent bad behavior. Her divorce, the photos of her without panties, her current melt down is why she is famous now. We, the public, are watching the systematic destruction of a human being and loving every minute of it.

It's time, past time, to turn off the cameras and let the little girl go. Maybe she can recover, maybe not, but enough already. We know more than we should and all of it is ugly.

Donald Trump gives me hives

I don't know what it is about Donald Trump that makes my skin crawl, but he does. Maybe, I am simply envious of his wealth. Or maybe it's his shameless pursuit of public adulation. The son of a wealthy real estate developer, Donald is really not the "great American success story," having started from a very comfortable upper middle class. Trump greatly benefited in the 1970s from the willingness of New York City to cut tax deals for those willing to invest in the city. But I cannot fault the guy for taking advantage of someone else's problems. That's the American way.

I think what really rankles is his overweening arrogance and I do wonder what he lacked in childhood that makes him demand that he be the best at everything. There's something about his smugness that makes me want to launch a cream pie in his general direction.

Tonight, Donald and his ridiculous comb over return to television with a celebrity version of The Apprentice. That's right, NBC, which irritated Trump by questioning the future of the reality show because of poor ratings, has been induced by the presence of d-list celebs to give Donald another try. Donald will be the first to remind us that he has been twice nominated for Emmys, for playing himself, and that he has a star on Hollywood's Walk of Fame (because he has the bucks to buy one). He has also appeared on wrestle mania, and has another show in the works, a cross between Dr. Phil and Judge Judy, in which he will offer financial advice.

Maybe I wouldn't have such a strong reaction if Donald had not taken his untalented self and put it on television.  I wonder if Donald buys his own PR--and why his current wife is never, and I do mean never, photographed with a smile on her face.

Having said all that, maybe Donald is an example of the modern American success story, whereby the scion of a wealthy family profits from the ills of others and then goes on to produce really awful reality TV.

Donald and his troop of has-beens will be on TV tonight and I will be elsewhere.