The world likes nothing better than a hot celebrity meltdown and Britney Spears is the gift that keeps on giving. Yesterday, she lost custody of her two sons to their father. That's how bad it is. A gigolo was determined by an LA judge to be the more competent parent--and no doubt with child support from Britney. She reacted in true pop tart fashion by turning over the kids to their pop and going to a tanning salon. Reportedly, she is under a suicide watch--whether at the tanning salon or not, the news stories do not say.
How the hell did this happen?
You might want to begin when her parents put her into show business, stage parent being the job of choice for underskilled parents with champaign taste on Pepsi money. Anyway, the kid gyrates herself into some sort of adult stardom and then finds true love with one of her back-up dancers. What Kevin Federline lacks in talent, he makes up for with street smarts. Yes, he was co-habitating with another woman, and yes they had children, but there was Britney all lush and flush with cash, the darling of the tweens and with a future and, according to sources, SHE asked HIM. Can you blame the guy? So they get married, have two kids and do not live happily ever after--well, she didn't anyway.
The thing is, K-Fed's initial grab for bags-o-cash was woefully mistimed. All he had to do was wait for the time bomb to explode, which it did, giving us all an unwanted gynecological education. So now he's got the kids and access to the cash. Is this a great country or what?
All that's left now is for him to bleed her financially dry and for her to end up doing dinner theater in some cheesy Louisiana location. I see the ghost of Jayne Mansfield before me and it ain't a pretty site.
Tuesday, October 2, 2007
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